Heart Break and Diamonds
by KaldeaOrchid
Summary: Mamoru might lose Usagi to an evil villain. How can he live without her?
1. A Chilling Blow

Rating: Rated PG just because I don't want it to be G. No cursings, no bad stuff. Yup.   
  
Spam Kills   
  
Mamoru stared blankly at the news Usagi had just broken to him.   
  
"What about Chibi-Usa? If you.... She won't exist."   
  
Usagi laughed at his suggestion, pulled out another piece of spam, and shoved it in her mouth. "Yes, I know. All the better. She's a brat," She paused. "Actually, she'll still exist... but it's fun to pretend."   
  
He seemed on the brink of tears. Who was this girl? Surely, she couldn't be the lovable bunny that he held in his arms just a day ago. She was cruel. Plus, she was eating spam. He choked out his next words. "Don't you love me?"   
  
"Well..." she hesitated. "No." She chuckled and again stuffed another piece of spam between her teeth. "I have to be going soon. He'll be here any minute."   
  
"WHO WILL?" Mamoru demanded.   
  
"I will."   
  
He looked to the direction of the voice. "Prince Demando!" he gasped.   
  
The figure sighed with disgust. "That's Prince Daiyamondo to you. I changed my name to the proper romanization a long time ago. Demando sounds too much like a G.I. Joe, and wasn't at all how you translate Diamond into Japanese."   
  
"We're speaking English right now. What does it matter?" Mamoru shot back.   
  
"It is only a matter of preferrence. Now... Usagi and I have our wedding to attend to. We'll be seeing you." Daiyamondo smiled with a look in his eyes that made it known that he was enjoying the way Mamoru writhed. He was a villain, after all.   
  
"You can't take her. She's mine." Mamoru denied what had been set before him.   
  
"Did she ever say she was your girlfriend?" Daiyamondo asked.   
  
"Well, no, but..."   
  
"Did she ever say she would marry you?" He put another question before the pathetic creature that sat before him.   
  
"Did she have to?" He shot back.   
  
"Yes. That's how she got TWO diamonds." (At this, Usagi extended her ring finger to show Mamoru a titanic diamond ring) "One for her finger, and one by her side, always."   
  
"What about Chibi-Usa?" Mamoru again asked.   
  
"Well, she's actually my daughter. Usagi didn't want to upset you. Then, you refused to lend her a quarter to continue her video game. This made her wonder if you cared about her at all. Chibi-Usa is mine. How do you think she got the hair and eyes? From a human?" Daiyamondo laughed out loud.   
  
"You're evil." Mamoru broke down into tears.   
  
"I know. See you after the honeymoon."   
  
With that, he and Usagi left, arm in arm, while Mamoru had a mental breakdown on his couch. 


	2. Mamoru goes postal - As requested, anoth...

"They're getting married." Mamoru repeated over and over. He was still preoccupied with having a breakdown on his living room couch. In fact, he never even heard Motoki come in. He was in the process of ripping his heart out with his teeth when Motoki spoke up and scared the living crap out of him.  
  
"Do they deserve to live after the pain they've caused you?" Motoki shook his head sadly.  
  
Mamoru brightened at this idea, and spoke with wild, mad eyes. "Wonderful advice, Motoki! I can always count on you. I had thought of killing myself, but not them. How will I get them to jump off my roof, though?"   
  
Fearing that Mamoru wasn't exactly in the best of mental health, Motoki stopped himself from saying anything more. He didn't want Mamoru to get the wrong idea about the words he had spoken. Instead, he just went to the local pawn shop and bought a sniper rifle for his dear friend. He assumed Mamoru would figure out how to use it when the time came.   
  
--------------------  
  
The scent of cherry blossoms floated through the air. The whole scene painted the very picture of serenity. Usagi, in her beautiful wedding dress, stood beside a charming Prince Daiyamondo. They looked at each other with love in their eyes and were glad to finally be joined together as one.  
  
At least, it was a scene of serenity until Mamoru burst through the doors at the reception (He had missed the ceremony. Too bad.) with his sniper rifle by his side. He nearly knocked over a table of spam and spray cheese, but it was saved by Usagi's mother before it hit the ground.  
  
"Time to die, everyone." Mamoru giggled as he searched for random people to dispose of. Remarkably, everyone stayed in their place as he did so. This made it rather easy for Mamoru to make his way to the couple. He aimed for Daiyamondo first. Putting his finger on the the trigger, he slowly pushed it in...  
  
"WAIT!" Daiyamondo spoke up.   
  
But it was too late. Blood splattered the table and the guests around him.  
  
"Oh well," said Usagi, who was dabbing a napkin at the blood splatters on her dress.   
  
"What a shame." Prince Daiyamondo sighed. He almost regretted telling Mamoru, but then thought more of it and changed his mind.  
  
Usagi's mother had just finished propping the spam table up with empty chairs and came over towards the happy couple. "Usagi, dear, who was the man who just killed himself in front of you?"  
  
Usagi looked almost wistful, though the subject had nothing to do with wistfulness. "No one, mom. Just someone who apparently didn't know how to use a gun."  
  
With that, all the guests burst out in laughter, Motoki included. What better time for the happy couple to mark the start of a beautiful future with a kiss? 


End file.
